Please come now I think I'm falling
Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge
And may be six feet
Ain't so far down
(See the video and lyrics links below)
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Today, 18th December, has been a long day and it refuses to die.
Kiwi left for UK; I got off the CRS project; witnessed the annual awards ceremony at work - all of which leave me pained. Worst of all - all of them on the same day. "It's funny", I think.
I wonder, come Monday whom will I call when Kiwi won't be around; what would my work day be like - without Jacob, Patrick, Abhay and Jatin; how long will I need to wait for that formal note of appreciation? The thoughts I've been thinking over the past couple days are no different from Nelly Furtardo's song - 'Why Do Good Things Come To An End?' A great friend gone away, a great team, with some of my dearest friends, which I am no longer a part of; a job well done appreciated by all except by those who control the strings of my career's growth. I wonder: 'Why?'
My 'self' tells me this is 'Balance'. You simply do not get all you want. And so you always crave - you get some, others you don't. And then the cycle repeats. It also tells me that in life I will meet them again so I should cheer up.
Alas, I know that 'Time' and 'Distance' make great barriers. And there is only so much one can converse over a phone call or IM. The feeling is familiar - just as when I had to leave behind Mike and Debbie in AK; Sajal and Supriya in Mumbai; and my team in Houston. Here are these people who come into your life, and without the slightest hint they become a part of your life, who care for you and whom you care for, adding to the meaning and making sense of your life. And just when you feel lucky to have them with you, it's time for them to leave. And you just stand by watching their distant bodies fade away.
Now I hang in a limbo - uncertain about everything - yet again. "Surely you aren't supposed to feel anything right? Surely you're strong right?" I wish I could answer in affirmation. 'But I can't', so I hear my 'self' scream.
And so, I want to raise a toast of a Long Island as I bid my friends adieu. Sadly, only saline water fills my peg. And I am ready for a second round and a third please. I refuse to pass out just as this night refuses to give in to the next day.
One more round please... and please keep that Rock playing.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge
And I'm thinking may be six feet
Ain't so far down
(See the video and lyrics links below)
Video : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yY1Nrznh4I
Lyrics: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/c/creed/one+last+breath_20034297.html
